How to count to ten on one hand!

Here is a blogpost in which I try to be informative. Hopefully you learn something. If you don't, I apologize. I'm a little off today cause I can't seem to buy the November 2011 issue of Q Magazine with Muse on the cover. It's in honor of their 25th anniversary, so they have 25 different issues for November, each issue with a special on the band that's on the cover. Or maybe it's 25 stories on 25 different bands. I forget. But it doesn't matter cause it's not like I'll be able to buy it.

This isn't really the cover of said magazine. Cause I couldn't find it. The epicosity level of this picture though is far greater than the epicosity of the cover I couldn't find. Unless this is actually an excerpt from said magazine which would be AWESOME.

Muse aside, I'm actually listening to K-pop right now. If you want some Cpop, here you go. Secretly, this song is really catchy. At least I think it is.

Also can I just say it should not take five hours to do my laundry. Yesterday when I dropped it off for the laundry peoples to clean it at 10, I figured it would definetly be done by 2, especially since there were only like 3 other baskets of laundry. Well, it wasn't done at 3 when I went. So when I went back at five, my clothes were really warm but also wet, and they all smell weird. Like they're burnt or something. D:

Oh my word I meant for this to be INFORMATIVE.

I think I have a right to say Chinese is one of the hardest classes I have ever taken (except a class I took on John Milton. Yikes dudeman. I think I had a nightmare about it a few nights ago actually). It's one thing to learn a language and be like "oh yea, Buch in German means book. That's easy." Chinese is... cool to learn. But very difficult. To help you fully comprehend my pain, I've compiled a two lists. 

Things I like about Chinese

• Words don't have a gender. So in German you would have different endings or whatever if a word was masculine, or feminine, or neuter (der die das). Chinese doesn't have that (THANK GOD). Sometimes, when I re-remember Latin, I want to fall into a coma.

• Verbs don't change. So if I were to say "you go", "ni qu" (I'm not gonna bother putting in tone marks, but they have tones, just be aware.) "I go"= "wo qu" "she/he goes"= "Ta qu". I forget what the word for they is, but you'd still us "qu". It never changes.

• "Ta". It means "she" and it means "he". In written form it's not confusing, but I think this is nice.

• Sentence structure is simple. And they don't have a lot of filler words like "of" or "an" or "the". "Ni hao" literally means "You good". "Wo qu fandian ma?" literally means "You go restaurant?"

Things that are horrible about Chinese

• So first, you learn the word in pinyin (written form). Then you learn its meaning. Then you learn its character. Japanese also has a lot of characters, but if you know at least 1000 you can read a paper easy. Korean has 26 characters. Chinese? Well you need to know at least 6000 characters to read a newspaper. It's said that there are over 80,000 Chinese characters, but many of them are rarely used. What's even more difficult is the amount of strokes in some of the characters. Egh.

• Tones. Are. Awful. "ma" with a dipping tone means horse, while "ma" with the same high tone means mom. I would like to take this chance to mention that apparently there's like 8 tones in Thai. I will never learn Thai. Ever.

• The way English speakers would pronounce some things in English, isn't the same in Mandarin. zh=j, q=ch, r=sh (although to be perfectly honest I'm pretty sure they pronounce the r differently everytime they use it. Sometimes it sounds like "shr" other times "r" or just "sh". I don't understand.) c=ts, x=sh, er= sounds like the "ar" in a pirate-y "argh!", yi=ee (as in eek), wanr= the n is silent so it sounds like you're trying to say "water" without the "te" in it. 

• Remember earlier how I mentioned that "book" in German is "Buch"? Well, there are practically no words in Chinese that sound like English... except for tea which is "Cha", and coffee which is "Kafei".

Now for another informative section, in which I will tell you how to count to ten in Mandarin. Not only in Mandarin, but also with ONE HAND. WHOA.

一 yī (one)
二 èr (two)
三 sān (three)
四 sì (four)
五 wǔ (five)
六 liù (six)
七 qī (seven)
八 bā (eight)
九 jiǔ (nine)
十 shí (ten)

You can do "3" the way it is in the picture, but another way is by making a sort of "ok" sign by bringing your thumb and pointer finger together, creating a circle, but leaving the three other fingers up.

I was really excited, because the day we learned how to count up to ten on one hand, me and Guiliani (another girl in my group) went to Pacman to get dumplings. Well we had to pay and I had given the guy 10 RMB but he didn't know how much my food was, so I excitedly made the sign for "8" with my hand, but like an IDIOT I said it in English. I was so mad at myself. I mean he understood me, but I keep saying things in English when I can just as easily say them in Mandarin.

Well, that's it for now. Next week is the national holiday, so I have no idea when I'll be posting things yet. I will also be going to Xian to see the Terracotta Army. We're taking a 20 hour sleeper train ride, cause it's up by Beijing. We'll only have a day and a half there, then have to take the 20 hour sleeper back, but will it be worth it? YES. 

TOTALLY.

WORTH IT.

RUSSIANS ARE READING MY BLOG?

• I'm feeling lazy. So I thought I'd try to be creative.

• This might get on my nerves after a while.
• And yes, you might have guessed from the title of my post, but according to the stats of my blog I have received two views from Russia recently. And this makes me so happy.
• In other news not related to China but totally related to Muse, I found this cover of their song Newborn that made me realize I will never accomplish anything musical. Ever.

Things that are starting to bug me in China.

• Getting stared at.
• My speaking class.
• Getting stared at.
• You encounter a variety of smells here. 90% of the time it's death. But I'm getting used to it. Also, I'm recovering from a cold. The cold helped clog my ability to smell, which was nice. But alas, it won't last forever. Whoa. That was weird. I was looking out the window for a moment and swore I saw Ezio crouching on the corner of a building. Anyways.
• Being stared at. I wear my heelies more often now just to give them something to stare at.
• Also recently, I keep falling asleep to the sound of cats fighting. I woke one morning from the sound of a defeated cat screaming out in pain at 5:45am in the morning. I thought I was dreaming. It was awful. I also dreamt of a green jaguar. The cat not the car.

Things I like

• Chopsticks. They make so much more sense.
• This tea drink I've been buying lately. I don't know what it's called cause it's in Chinese, but it's pretty good.
• A milk tea place me and my friends found. It's so good. They make the best bubble tea. I've realized I can't get it for my classes, cause I drink it so fast and have to pee within the first 15 minutes, and class lasts like an hour and a half.

• See what I did there? Also, whilst looking for Matthew Bellamy photos I found a ton of Kate Hudson photos. I promptly barfed. Not in real life. Just in my head.
• I love this food called matuan. It's delicious. I had it for breakfast. I had it for lunch. I want to make them when I get back. It's probably impossible. But I will find a way.

• It's getting colder. I love the cold.By colder I mean it's like 75 degrees Fahrenheit now.
• I love Chinese food. The only thing I really miss is coffee. Real coffee. Not instant. Apparently coffee the way we (Americans) make it is... well... an American thing. WHY must the ONLY THING that MATTERS be AMERICAN?!
• I'm wearing heelies right now. And I love that.
• Seeing one star in the sky is exciting. Really.
• My listening class. The teacher is funny.
• My Chinese name. It's hilarious.
• I'm sure there's something else but I can't think right now.
• The science museum we went to in Shanghai.
• This bracelet I bought in Shanghai WHICH I FORGOT TO WEAR TODAY? WHAT?! NO!

Things you should know

• Never buy a pizza here. It takes longer to make than steak. I don't know why it does, but last night we waited two hours for this kid's pizza to come out, and we had all already finished our food. One time, when we got pizza from pizza hut, we waited a while even then (although not two hours) but this OTHER kid's pizza "broke", so we had to wait for them to make another one. Which took forever.
• I just started the sixth season of Doctor who. Which means I will have caught up. I guess I can always rewatch seasons with the tenth doctor.
• Chinese people don't wear hoods. I was talking to these two Chinese girls, Jenny and Rachel about it, asking them cause I noticed no one ever had a hood up or anything. They promptly told me Koreans do that. Not the Chinese.
• The hair stylists here are all male. I don't want a guy cutting my hair, but it's apparently considered taboo for a girl to touch a guys hair, plus a guy can work longer cause he doesn't have the possibility of getting pregnant. Psh.
• I wear a backpack now.
• I figured out what I'm doing for Houghton's Spot when I come back in the spring. Will it be awesome? I dunno. You tell me after you've seen it. Give me like 5 months. 6? Hopefully I won't slip on the Roth hill like last time while heelying down its icy slope, thus spraining my finger. Which is still crooked and ugly. But minor details.
• I haven't played the piano in like a month. I need to find one. Somewhere.
• The drain in my bathroom smells. D;
• I like my internship. I work at a magazine/newspaper place. I did I mention that yet? Well now I did.
• I wrote a poem recently. Which I won't share. I just felt like I should include that on this random list of shenanigans that happens to Brittany. Or should I say Wei Li. Wei Jian Li to be exact. Is that my Chinese name? What could it mean? If you're friends with me, just look at my alternate name on facebook. Copy it into a translator. Laugh. Rinse and repeat.
• Agh I should really be studying my grammar for my dictation tomorrow. By that I mean I have to memorize like 20 Chinese words (pinyin and character).
• I can get a hair cut here for 16 Yuan. So 2 dollars. Jealous? Well you could always fly out here and get one yourself.
• I don't know what else to write.
• The bullet train we took to Shanghai was really smooth. We didn't even realize we stopped at one point actually and thought we were still moving, and the movement outside we thought was a tree was actually a person, boarding the stationary train.
• We ate at this place tonight that sold smiley fries. They were delicious. I also ate a fish eye. It tasted like a soft jaw breaker, at least that's how Justin, the garbage disposal described it. He ate the other eye. And the brain.
• I bought toilet paper in bulk. I know you wanted to know that. DON'T LIE TO YOURSELF.
• And that's all. For now.

Have fun with your life and stuff peoples.

Lady White and the Mid Autumn Festival

So in case you haven't noticed. I am a horrible blogger. I didn't mean to write what I wrote about two days ago. I meant to share a folktale that takes place in Hangzhou, specifically the West Lake. But I did I. No. Also, the Mid-Autumnal Festival was this past weekend. Did I even so much as mention that? No.

So sorry about failing.

Alright. So. The story from West Lake. Just to let you know, it's Hangzhou's equivalent to Romeo and Juliet (which we all know just ended so well), and the story is set during the Song Dynasty, when Hangzhou was the capitol of China. Also, if you really want to know, Leifeng Pagoda is actually the pagoda me and my friends went to two weekends ago.



I thought about rewriting it myself, but I actually just found a pretty decent retelling of the story. In some versions Xu (the man known as Blue) and Bai (Lady White) met when Xu was just a boy, and he had actually saved her life. But apparently that was added on or something. So his retelling of it is fairly accurate. So please go to this site to read about "The Legend of the White Snake".

Now. Mid-Autumn Festival, or rather, Mooncake Festival.

For those of you who don't know, tt's sort of like the Chinese equivalent to our Thanksgiving holiday. The festival is always held on the 15th day of the 8th month of the lunar calendar, so sometime in September or early October.

It's meant to celebrate the end of the fall harvest, and the main food everyone eats are mooncakes.


They're actually really good. Well, okay to be perfectly honest there was this one kind that made me want to gag. I think it was the worst thing I've ever tasted. And I've tasted a lot of weird things. But I had one that looks like the mooncake to the far right in the picture above, and I think it was my favorite. It had an egg in it or something. Sometimes they fill mooncakes with meat, or bean paste (everything is bean paste here. Don't get something just cause you think it looks like chocolate. Twelve times out of ten it will be bean paste, not chocolate. It's never chocolate). But like I said, they're pretty good. Just avoid the ones that have an especially dark color.

There's also a legend that's associated with the Moon Festival. So I'll tell it to you. Or write it to you. Cause my computer can't transform me into a hologram.

Chang'e and Houyi the Archer
Chang'e and her husband, Houyi, were immortals that lived in heaven. One day, the ten sons of the Jade Emperor had transformed themselves into ten suns, scorching the earth. Because his sons would not stop even after he ordered them to, the Jade Emperor asked Houyi for help. With bow and arrow in hand, Houyi shot down the nine sons, sparing only one son to provide light to earth. The Jade Emperor, displeased with Houyi's violent solution to stopping his sons, banished Houyi and Chang'e to earth, to live out their days as mortals.


Having lost her immortality, Chang'e became extremely miserable. Houyi, concerned for his wife and wanting to see her smile again, began on a long and perilous quest to find the pill of immortality so the two of them could once again be immortals in the celestial plane. He finally met the Queen Mother of the West who agreed to give him the pill, and told him each person would only need half the pill to be fully immortal.


Bringing the pill home, he stored it in a case and told Chang'e not to open it. He then left home for a little bit. Chang'e, her curiosity getting the better of her, opened the case and found the pill just as she heard Houyi return home. Afraid that Houyi would catch her discovering the pill, she accidentally swallowed the entire thing. Because she swallowed all of it instead of only half of it, she began to float into the sky, eventually landing on the moon, where she would live for the rest of her days as the Goddess of the Moon.


So yea. That's what I've been meaning to write/tell you about. Hope you appreciate it.

In other news, everyone here smokes between classes, so merely leaving the building during the 30 minute break is probably taking minutes if not years off my life. Oh you Europeans, smoking. Sure, you may think you look cool now, but just wait until they have to cut a hole in your throat and you lose you ability to speak on your own and have to sound like a robot. I'm sure that will attract all the ladies. Or men. Depending on who you are.

That reminds me. Here, the bathrooms don't have a security wall that's usually in boys bathrooms. So yes, I did see a guy, his back turned, using a urinal. It was great. Awesome even. Superb.

Also they told us if we're late 40 minutes, it's the equivalent to missing 2 classes. So why come into class at all? Some kid today came in late, and that's all I could think about.

In other news someone called me a foreigner in Chinese, "laowai". But that's all they said when I passed. Thank you old Chinese dudeman. If I knew more Chinese I would have said yes, but I don't even know that. The Chinese language is very different from English. A lot simpler actually. They don't have male/female/nuetral forms of words or articles. Thank God. I hated that in German and Latin. Ugh. Dear Lord. The Latin. Endings in Latin are horrible, even if it's not spoken. It's horrible. HORRIBLE.

So have fun with your life and stuffs people. Until the next time I decide to actually tell you something about China.

Chinese classes went great

So I'm currently on season 5 of Doctor Who. I do like Matt Smith, but I for realz really miss David Tennant. I think he was by far the best Doctor. Eccleston just... seemed lame. I don't know. He didn't have what Tennant had.



I would keep going on and on, but the majority of people who read this probably don't watch Doctor Who, so everything I would say would just go over your head. I might as well just be talking to myself. Or a big stupid monkey.

In other news, my classes started yesterday. I wish I could say it was wonderful, and that I comprehended the Chinese language right away and am now fluent. However, if you live in reality and would like an accurate portrayal of what I felt like by my third class yesterday, then here you go.



You see, in our first class (listening) we had to get up in front and introduce ourselves, which really wasn't all that bad. Sort of weird, but not horrible. We had 10 minutes to kill, so our teacher taught us the tones. Then by the second class (grammar) we went over some words and stuff, and in the last 20 minutes we went over tones. Then by the THIRD class (speaking) we spent the ENTIRE hour and thirty minutes reviewing the four tones. It was worse then being stuck on a purgatory island. It was dreadful. I envisioned running from the room screaming. I kept moving around in my chair. You looked at the time, and realized you had only an hour left when it felt like forever had already passed you by. I was hoping the Daleks would suddenly decide to invade earth. Cyber men. Giant babies. Anything.

However, nothing of the sort happened. I took a three hour nap afterwards. Then I found out I had an article due tomorrow for That's Zhejiang. I'm very happy I knew about this well in advance.

In other news, I'm getting sick of people staring at me. I like to wear my sun glasses, just because it gives me an excuse to stare back. Maybe some of you think it's wonderful that people would stare at you so much, and that Chinese people seem to think Westerners are so beautiful while they themselves are not. But when you think about it, it's almost racist. Placing people of white color on such a high pedestal. I hate it actually. There's a lot of white people in advertisements, and at first it's comforting to see white people, even if it is in advertisements, but then I realize I'm in China, and for them to see that, it's the equivalent of us having to look at skinny models who never eat everyday in our advertisements.

Sometimes I wish I wasn't white. But that is probably also racist. I wish there wasn't a minority. I wish everyone was on equal terms. I wish people would stop staring at me cause I'm white.

And by stare, I don't mean casually glance. I meant you're just walking down the street, and the person ten yards in front of you stares. And they don't STOP staring at you until they've walked a good couple of feet past you. 

Anycrap, I need to practice writing some Chinese characters for class, so I should probably go. Also, I realized I've been here almost three weeks. I'm supposed to be keeping a journal for my intercultural studies advisor and write a journal entry every four days. So I should have at least written five entries.

How many have I written you ask?

Well it's the equivalent to the number of great works of literature Stephenie Meyer has written.

By that I mean NONE.

I would write more, but I can't focus. Also my hands can't seem to type properly today, and I sort of want to throw my keyboard into the fires of Mount Doom every other word.

So I'll end with this video that combines two loves of mine. And you thought I wasn't going to mention Muse at all, didn't you? ALSO APPARENTLY THERE IS A DOCTOR WHO EPISODE WHERE A MUSE SONG PLAYS. JUST THOUGHT I WOULD MENTION THAT.

ME. EXCITED. NEVER.

But this song is pretty good, except I don't like the intro part with Uprising when the alien tune from Uprising is playing at the same time the alien tune from the Doctor Who theme is playing. It should be one or the other. Besides that it's pretty alright.

Procrastination Initiated

Guess what I'm doing?

Procrastinating.

And I'm quite good at it.

Like I just spent about 30 minutes trying to find a decent Doctor Who quote to put in my facebook status.

Time well spent.

Ok, to be honest, I should be writing an article for my internship at That's Zhejiang. These two British guys (one's in charge of the paper version, and one's in charge of the magazine version) are sort of our bosses I guess? Anyways, Taylor and I both thought our first day would just involve us editing other people's articles. Then we found out, since we're "newbies" to Hangzhou, they want our first impressions of the city. Or an outsider's view. Fresh stuff.

So long story short, I've got 154 words out of the 300 word minimum.

I know, I'm halfway there, whoaaaa...


I'll tell you what I wrote about if it gets published. Don't worry, I'm not feeling any pressure. Especially since there's only like what, 6 million people who live in Hangzhou and could potentially be reading this?

Psh. Whatevs dudeman.

In other news, I bought three books at this massive bookstore called Booku for 98 Yuan, so 16 dollars? I think? Yea? I realized I have like nothing to read. So I figured a 1000 page volume one of Sherlock Holmes stories would help solve this dilemma.

In other news I just finished episode 12 in season four of Doctor Who. I might be borderline obsessed, mostly because I've been watching it so much, and also because the past few episodes have been SO GOOD. I think Catherine Tate (or Donna Noble as she's known in the show) is probably my favorite companion thus far. Martha just... I dunno. Annoyed me somehow. And Rose was pretty cool, but I think I only liked her in the most recent of episodes she appeared in. I must say I'm slightly jealous of her and her life. In the show.

Spoilers? Don't worry.

Did I even mention anything about China?

Well I have a phone. We went to a museum today. I'm currently sitting in the apartment alone, and it's midnight. And I should really finish this article. I've probably written more than 300 characters already. Blimey.

Oh and the moon festivals in like four days, so I should have something exciting to report. Did I mention we're going to a theme park? We were all excited, cause we're going for free cause this other newspaper whose name has escaped me that writes a lot about international shenanigans is taking westerners out on the 11, because well it's the tenth anniversary of 9/11. Although none of us are sure if theme park means rides, or the opposite of rides. I tried looking it up on google, but I kept getting hotels. And I'm pretty sure we're not going to a hotel.

Alright, I'm gonna stop procrastinating and looking up Muse videos on youtube and funny moments of various shows I love.



Alright. New tidbits.
-You can't flush your toilet paper, but must throw it away.
-Exit signs here are green.
-I ate my dinner in a dark alleyway. I'm pretty sure it was because I was white. Also, the restaurant (which we've called Pacman for the red Pacman sign out front) was crowded.
-All the coffee here... is instant D:

So have fun with your life and stuffs. Until next time. When I write something worthwhile.

The Furious Eight

Sorry. I just really like Simon's Cat, and he recently brought out a new video, so I felt inclined to share it.

You know what I love even more than that though?



Alright, I feel like maybe I should introduce the people I will be studying abroad with. Or rather, am studying abroad with. At least, in the way I imagine them. If I was artistic I would draw cartoon versions of them, complete with the captions I've created for them. But I'm not.

The Guys
Balasz, the Foreigner
Peter, the 31 year old
Justin, the garbage disposal

The Girls
Guiliani, lover of Korean dramas
Kelsey, the kung fu artist
Taylor, the Sigourney Weaver look-a-like
Carey, the Backstreet Boys groupie

We just recently found out Peter is 31. None of us had any idea. Balasz is 24, so we though he was the oldest in the group. Until Friday night, when it was discovered that Peter was the oldest in our group. Everyone's mind was blown. We thought he was 24. He doesn't even look 31. You want to know who else is also 31?


Bet you didn't see that one coming.

Alright, here's the part where I say something about China.

Today is my first day at my internship. If I had a Tardis I could easily have come back in time to tell you how it went. However I am not the Doctor. Although I am currently in the fourth season, specifically episode 6. Also, the tenth doctor bears a close resemblance to a certain lead singer of a certain UK band.

Alright China.

CHINA.

I WILL WRITE ABOUT CHINA

Well, to be honest there's too much to write about.

I say that all the time, but I'm being for-serious here. I'm also busy half the time, and I haven't written my blog in a while, and I sort of forgot to write to my parents for a week because the internet wasn't working and we were busy... so I probably won't get daughter of the year cause they probably thought I was dead on the corner of a street somewhere.

So because I fail-boated, and haven't written in a week, here's a succinct version of my weekend, followed by a brief recap of the previous week.

Saturday. Went to West Lake. Walked around for 3 hours cause I can't read a map. Found Leifeng Pagoda. Spent 40 RMB and climbed it. Got some pictures of West Lake. Hailed and took a taxi for the first time in my life. Went to some section of town where kids were learning how to roller blade. Kelsey was invited by her Chinese friend August to help promote something. So me, Kelsey, and Guiliani went. Found out that, in Chinese, they were promoting their school to parents, telling them we were the teachers. We then got paid 100 Yuan.

Earlier last week. Went to a Tea House. Ate a lot. Like, a lot a lot. Apparently people stay there all day. Did laundry cause I was running out of clean underwear/socks. Went to a restaurant the next day, where I got a free sandwich cause the waiter couldn't remember who had ordered it. It was a veggie sandwich. Tasted like a tatter tot between two pieces of bread. My friend Kelsey dropped a slice of pizza on the table. I grabbed it, telling her there were starving children in China. Then I got excited cause I realized I was talking about myself.

Um. None of that is exciting. This is a very poorly planned blog post. So sorry about that. I'M BUSY ALRIGHT. JUST DEAL. Next time I promise the post will make more sense, and be more interesting. Actually like an hour after I post I always think of a bajillion better things I could have written about. Then I forget about those bajillion ideas the next time I post. I promise I'll try to think the next time I write.

In the meantime, here are some interesting tidbits
-Everyone air dries their clothes.
-They like weird flavored things. Like blueberry chips.
-Many children start to learn English at the age of 3.
-Old people here are much more, respected I guess you could say. At least, the old people here don't scare me like in America. I don't know how to describe it. Like I feel like because of the way Americans are it's easy for the elderly to just not to anything all day and slowly lose themselves, but here everyone is active. Like super active.
-Not everyone has a dog here. I don't think a lot of people have pets actually. I've only seen maybe three people with dogs since I've been here?

I forget what else I've written in the past. But last night I saw a pretty bright star, and that makes the fifth star I've seen so far since I've been here.

So have fun with your life and stuffs peoples. Until next time.